Are You Selfless Or Stupid?
Posted by Mitch Mitchell on Apr 27, 2012
At the beginning of this week I sent a lot of information to a guy whose company had asked about a particular thing I knew something about. Knowing something about it though and having it in writing were two different things, so I spent about 4 hours searching online for the proof I needed to send to these people. What I didn't do is discuss money or payment up front, since they said they needed the information quickly, because I didn't think it would take me as long to find the information as it did. This means I'm probably not going to get paid for it since there's no contract for the work.
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I've had others tell me that I'm being stupid (though not necessarily that specific word) for giving away so much information without getting paid for every bit of it. Some have said that I give away so much information on this blog that people have no reason to hire me to work with them. I've been told the same thing about my newsletter. One guy specifically told me that if I wasn't generating money from my newsletter after six months that I was wasting my time; I've been writing my newsletter for 9 years and never made a dollar off of it.
I want to make money as much as the next person, lots of it. Yet I never have set myself up to be someone who wouldn't give anything if money wasn't on the table. Yes, I have given a lot away for free, and yes, many people have benefited, even monetarily, from advice I've given them without my getting paid for it.
Truthfully, most of the time I haven't even thought about it, but maybe I should. When one guy I gave a free coaching to told me that he'd signed a contract with $85,000 about 2 weeks after we'd talked, I didn't necessarily expect to be paid for helping him focus on doing it, but I guess I had expected that, somewhere, he'd have written a testimonial of some sort thanking me for helping him. Sure, coaching is confidential, but I guess I saw it as more of business consulting after the fact.
But that's just how I am. I figure I'll get my money and recognition when people really value what I might help them do; everyone has a different way of evaluating value. I don't see myself changing all that much, although I do recognize I have to keep a better watch on how much I'm restricting my own income.
When it comes to being a leader, though, there can't be any thoughts except in being altruistic to those who report to you. If you want things done correctly and you want the people in your office, or wherever you work, feeling motivated and confident in what they do, you have to be selfless and available and encouraging. You can't expect that any of them will thank you for being that way or will even notice that you're doing things for them.
Instead, you have to feel your own sense of accomplishment in doing the right thing, as well as be pleased when your production numbers are looking great and you know the part you played in it. The more selfless you are in business, the more you'll end up getting back from it if managed properly.
Compare being selfless versus being stupid in this case; which one do you think will bring the most benefit back to you?
I have fell in similar situation this week. For about a month I negotiate a contract with a company and actually we never really close this conversation, never agree the rates and company owner left the country and actually his company need my service. I don’t think that this case is nothing to do with me but with 3rd party inability to manage business, trying to save some money will cause huge trouble for whole company.
Mitch, I experience this regularly, although I never questioned whether I was stupid or selfless. I think selflessness is rare and defines us as truly authentic. Yet I also think some of what I give away deserves a price tag. Speaking for a living is tricky – as many don’t feel it’s a service they should pay for. I’m learning to negotiate, but there has to come a point where the final rate is just that – the final rate. So I consider myslef selfless to a point…and that’s okay. (O:
Thanks for sharing Joleene. Yes, the speaking thing is tough, along with the training, because people aren’t sure how to value it since they don’t do it. And I’ve given a lot away and know people have benefited from it, but there are times when I know I’ve benefited in some way from what someone’s given me so I don’t want to be hypocritical. But when others point it out to you, sometimes you have to reflect on it.
Hey Mitch,
I don’t think it’s stupid at all. I personally think that your reward will eventually come. The more people you help, the more opportunity you’ll have to work on your own weaknesses. You never know when somebody will provide you with a key piece of information that you’ve been missing, and dramatic change will occur.
I agree that you have to put food on the table, but it really is about giving away much more value than what you make. It’s that valuable content that makes those familiar with you willing to pay for those services you do charge for.
Keep on keeping on, my friend. It’ll all work out in the end as long as you keep moving in the right direction.
~Barry
Thanks Barry. It’s funny how people sees this one in many different ways. The old school business people think what I do is madness; younger people think everything should be free. It’s an interesting balance, that’s for sure.