You Must Believe In Yourself
Posted by Mitch Mitchell on Mar 8, 2016
I have a friend who recently lost her job after working at the company for over 30 years. She's one of the smartest people I know, so while we were having lunch days after it happened I told her that she should look at it as an opportunity to maybe do something else, something big that could make her a lot of money and have a chance to live a life she might love.
She listened to my words... but she didn't act on them. Instead, she started applying for all sorts of jobs that, in my mind were beneath someone of her intellect. I understand what it's like being out of a job and trying to find something to bring income into the household. At the same time, I was never one to limit myself to low hanging fruit until I absolutely had to.
I know a lot of people who believe that their path in life is set at a young age. Go to school, get a diploma, get a job, don't make waves, rinse, repeat, retire. Sure, every once in a while one of them gets a promotion into leadership, but it happens rarely. Leadership positions scare a lot of people.
What's even scarier is taking a chance on one's own and seeing what they can do with it. I understand this one very well. It took a great leap of faith those 14 1/2 years ago when I decided to try things as a solo entrepreneur. Over the course of time, I've had some major successes as well as some major stress. Life isn't perfect to any degree.
Yet, I've had some great adventures, traveled to places I never thought I would, spoken to people in 9 states and got paid for it, flown first class so often I started to feel I was entitled... aah, it's been a lot of fun.
You want to know a truth? As much as I enjoy working on my own, it takes a lot of courage to even try. I had my hand forced so I went with it. When I got into it, I literally knew nothing except how to do the work I wanted to do. I didn't know anything about marketing or sales. I didn't know anything about sending out letters, and email was still relatively new.
I had written a few things, but nothing like what I would accomplish later on. I'd never even thought about creating a project, let alone writing books. I wasn't afraid to speak in front of people, but to actually stand in front of a bunch of people and get paid to do it? Who'd have ever thought.
You know what I did have? I had the self confidence to at least give it a try. I knew that if I believed in myself that good things could come out of it. After all, I'd already had a nice track record of that sort of thing happening throughout my life, so why couldn't it happen by going it alone?
No matter what you decide to do in life, you have to believe in yourself. It's not as easy as it sounds; I know that because most people I meet don't come close to believing in themselves. They're ready to allow someone to talk them out of things instead of thinking for themselves or believing in themselves enough to shut out the noise of discouragement.
I'm one of the few lucky ones. My wife went along with my trying to have this kind of life. My parents worried for a short while, then came along; that's what parents do.
via Compfight |
I didn't have a single friend tell me I was crazy for trying. I kept expecting someone to try to talk me out of it, but it never happened. I think it's because my life had been a pattern of telling myself I could do it if I only tried. If I didn't think I could do something, I didn't do it, which is why it turns out I can't paint or use a hammer (that's a shame isn't it? lol).
In my opinion there are six stages to get through:
Being comfortable in the knowledge or talent about something - no matter what it is, you have to look deep into yourself, acknowledge what you're good at, and determine what you believe your worth is at that particular thing.
Believing that you're as good as, if not better, than others in doing something - this is not conceit but a true assessment of your skill level when you compare yourself to others doing the same thing. There are a lot of folk who will tell you that you should never compare yourself to others. That's new age thinking; life is about competition, whether you always win or not.
Being willing to contemplate action steps - these apply whether you want to work for yourself, work in a particular industry, work your way up the ladder, work your way towards a certain level of pay... as well as things in your personal life.
Courage - action steps mean nothing if you never have the courage to put something into action.
Learning how to self motivate - we all have patches of time when we're in mental distress, whether it's because something isn't going right or we're unsure of our actions. It takes courage to start something; it takes self motivation to keep you on course.
Showing others your belief in yourself and your skills - unfortunately, none of us can succeed in a vacuum. If you're a writer, you need buyers to succeed. If you're working at your job you need to impress the right people to get a promotion or more money. If you're a consultant, you have to market yourself and let people know what you're good at because they're probably not going to find out any other way.
If you believe in yourself with all your heart, others will have to believe in you. When you succeed, they succeed; people love hanging around with winners. 🙂
I read this some time ago on Facebook and it beautifully reflects what you’re sing here. Unfortunately, I forgot to write down the source.
“My success took me the exact amount of time it took for me to trust myself, to trust my essence, to trust this Presence, this other realm and momentum of ease and goodness you never see on the road.”
It was said by a lady named Tama Kieves; I looked it up. lol It does take a lot of time, and then it takes “rinse and repeat” or a change in product because sometimes that success is temporary. But no matter what it is, belief in oneself is everything isn’t it? Heck, you’re kind of the embodiment of it in my eyes. 🙂
Thanks, Mitch, for the kind words, and for looking it up. lol
I wish I trusted myself more, because … well, we all wish we could do better.
Hi Mitch,
I loved this article and really support the steps you have shared here. I think we live in a world where so many people limit themselves based on what their circle (family, parents, friends, etc) are all doing. They go with the flow, like you shared. Rinse and repeat like you said.
People have asked me how I have been able to do some of the things that I have done and to me the answer is simple. I just do it. I don’t limit myself. I don’t consider others in different leagues than I am in. Which is why I’ve been able to connect with some amazing people, celebrities and top leaders. I’m not sharing to toot my horn so to speak. To me, I just talk to others as if we are eye to eye and it takes any level of fear or intimidation away. I think we just have to trust in our unique self and the fact that we are all special in our own way and valued.
Great post. Have a great upcoming week.
Irish
Thanks Irish. I’m with you, sometimes you just have to “do it” and see what happens. Sometimes it’s good stuff; sometimes maybe it doesn’t quite achieve what you were hoping for. But at least you know, and you can always try again, while those that never try never know. I always feel it’s better to know and to have faith in yourself and what you’re trying to do. 🙂
Hey there Mitch! I ab-solutely love this article. Gosh its soooo true. It takes a ton of courage to do this entrepreneurship thing…like seriously!
As you stated, its all about stepping out on faith and truly believing in yourself. I was listening to a video that Steve Harvey did on yesterday called “You Have to Jump” and this is exactly what he was talking about.
Great article…sharing it as we speak…
Thanks Ki. I acknowledge that there are a lot of scary things out there, but some of them we can overcome with belief in ourselves and our ability. One thing we probably should also do more, especially me, is be willing to ask for help from time to time. Of course, offering it pays it forward… something I do often. 🙂