Do You “Hate” For The Right Reason?
Posted by Mitch Mitchell on Jun 1, 2011
"Don't hate the playa, hate the game."
Last night I was watching the first game of the NBA Finals between the Miami Heat and the Dallas Mavericks. During the second quarter, one of the announcers stated that the Heat were the most heated team in the league based on fan voting, and that LeBron James was the most hated player.
Another commentator questioned both of these. He said how could anyone hate a team that only wanted to win, that had done what other teams have done over the years. He also said how could anyone hate a person whose only sin was changing job locations, and took a pay cut no less.
I've talked about this concept of hate before when used in an improper context. For some people "hate" is a strong word, while for others it's just the word they use because it's expedient. Goodness, I use the word here and there because it just pops into my head when something irritates me so I'm not standing on any pedestal here.
However, I always try to have a reason for anything that I really hate. There are times when the reasons are flimsy, but they're the reasons. Sports gives one great excuses to hate rivals of our favorite teams. I can say I hate the Celtics because they're a rival of the Los Angeles Lakers, my favorite team. I can say I hate the Georgetown Hoyas basketball team because they're a rival of my Syracuse Orange team. I can say I hate the Yankees, but everyone except Yankee fans hates the Yankees, so it doesn't really mean anything.
On this blog I once wrote a post called I Hate Bullies, and I stand behind that hatred. Anyone who's ever had to deal with a bully in their life probably carries this hatred around. I hate people that prey on others, physically or mentally. I hate companies that take advantage of both their customers and the people who work for them. I hate bugs. After that, I don't really have a lot of consistent hate.
Showing hateful thoughts towards people for reasons that make no sense is illogical. I never hate anyone because someone else says they hate them. I rarely hate someone who made a mistake and did something bad. I rarely hate customer service people that can't answer my questions because they didn't make the error. True hate is one of those things that just sticks with you, that's hard to shake, and it can color your judgment.
Reserve your real hate for those things that deserve it. If you do that, you'll find that you'll actually have a much more pleasant life because you'll find that you really don't hate all that many things. It's a much better way to live.
Dear Mitch, I am a very friendly person and I agree with you on what real hate is…I hat people that hurt children including bullies. I hate dealing with customer service but not the person on the other end they are just doing their job. And you are very correct if we hate less than that energy spent hating can be channeled into something positive.
Thanks Valerie. I’m certainly not a hateful person, though it seems sometimes like it would be easy to be. But focusing on the right things helps all of us progress.
Like “love”, “hate” is among the most misused and abused words in the English language. We toss these words about frivolously without considering their real meaning. I’m certainly guilty of it as well since it’s such a common habit among us all. The old adage of “hating the sin and not the sinner” is good advice that we should heed more closely. Thanks for the reminder.
Lee
Tossing It Out
No problem Arlee. In your context, the word “hate” and “love” do go together; I think it’s because humans in the long run are fairly passionate people that like expressing their immediate emotion without real thought. For the most part there’s nothing wrong with that.
Sports teams and athletes evoke strong emotions because of the competitive spirit they represent. It’s either you love them or you hate them. But then again, “hate” is such a commonly used word that can connote a range of emotions from dislike to pure hatred. I do agree with you we should be careful about hating some people who are just doing what they’re supposed to do.
Thanks Jim. I like making sure I take my grief to the right people, that’s for sure.
Hate is a strong word. For me, I hate when people lie to my face and the fact that I know that they are lying to me.
That would irk me as well Marshal. Yeah, I think dishonesty is one of the biggest moral fails anyone can do to another.
I toss the word “hate” around if I’m really pissed, which is really not frequent. Although we probably know how ‘heavy’ it is, we use even at small irksome things because it’s easy to.
That’s how I see it, Anne. And we truly don’t hate in most of those moments.
Just hate for rational reasons. 😀 Some people who hate others do not even have reasons and they will just say that they just hate, no reasons at all. I’d say HATE if that person or thing deserve it. 😀
Great stuff Grace. I can’t say there’s a lot of people I know that I hate, but there are lots of famous, or infamous people I hate with a passion.