It seems that many people have found a way to get around their stance against politically correct speech. They say or do what they want, then when they're called on it they apologize after the fact. But the apology is not only false, but they don't apologize for what they've done. Instead, they apologize if what they said or did bothered anyone.

The First To Apologize
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Such was the case for a show called Big Brother a few years ago. Charges of racism were doled out against some of the participants on the show, who were caught on camera yet not on the TV show (seems the cameras are always running and others can watch a live feed) saying things that showed who they really were inside. I'm still trying to figure out how people forget that they're being watched and taped 24/7 with cameras and microphones everywhere (even in the bathroom from what I hear, though aimed at showers instead of toilets) but they do.

The three finalists and one person eliminated earlier all lost their jobs and had their companies disassociate themselves from these people because of things they said when they forgot where they were. The one eliminated early first tried to explain her behavior, then cried and tried to apologize, but it was too late for that. The other three learned at about the same time what people saw and what was being said about them. One of them was lucky to have won $500,000 on the show; the other two weren't so lucky.

Politicians are great at doing and saying things that are meant to stir up controversy and trouble and then back down later on with a false apology. It's a common practice these days; say what you want then apologize for it. Sometimes voters do the right thing and oust those people but many times they don't care and will put a phony back in office. It shows a lack of ethics, but it is what it is.

The #MeToo movement has brought about a lot of apologies... some of them quite unexpected. I wasn't surprised by the apologies of men who messed up; I've been surprised by the number of women who said something "incorrectly", then ended up apologizing for it. Social media is a juggernaut few people have actually learned how to handle... I'll put myself on that list, even though I've been online for close to 15 years.

I'm someone who tends to believe that if you're really apologizing then you should do it sincerely to the person you've aggrieved. I'll admit that there are times when I apologize to someone for another person's bad behavior, whether or not I know the other person; I have no idea why I do that.

There are other times when I say something, mean it, don't care who doesn't like it and will often end it with "yeah, I said it!" Most of the time it's when the topic concerns racism or diversity issues. Those posts are honest and hard hitting and I'm saying something I feel needs to be said. If you're ready to back up your position no matter what, at least you're being honest with yourself, even if others don't like it. In that case, there's no need to even think of apologizing unless you're calling out a specific person who's innocent of what you might be accusing them of.

Luckily, I'm never as mean as a lot of other people can be when I'm telling truths. If I thought I was off the mark, I'd apologize in an instant. I try to go out of my way so that I eliminate as often as possible the need to apologize, but sometimes a person might take something you said the wrong way. Apologizing in those instances isn't difficult as long as you're trying to correct the message at the same time.

What I really hate are those people who say something, then apologize, not for what they said but the blanket "if you were offended by what I said then I apologize"; how sincere does that sound to anyone without an explanation?

It takes courage to apologize when necessary, but it takes both courage and sincerity to be apologizing for the right reason. That's my take on it anyway; what say you?