Feeling Good

As I sat down to write this particular newsletter, I was struck with a different problem than what usually falls upon someone who has a time frame with which they need to produce something. Instead of trying to come up with a topic to write about, I have many that hit my fancy, all at the same time. Most of them are positive, with a little bit of negative in them. Most of them are life changing, at least for me. Most had me returning to my former self, which is always a good thing. So today, I'm going to talk about change, taking chances, benefits that can come from trying to change, and why you deserve to be happy. What a pleasant idea.

Last week I ended a long term contract with an organization that I had been subcontracting with. I ended it because I was unhappy with it; that's all I need to say about that. I realized that I went into the venture with one thing in mind; making the almighty dollar. I stayed with it for that same reason. But from the first month I was unhappy, and I was falling deeper and deeper into my own little depression. At the time I should have been feeling at the top of my world, I was allowing someone else to bring me down.

So I did what I've always told other people they need to do. I took control of my life, and I decided it was time to fire a client. Not many people get to do that; few have the luxury in their own minds. I say it that way because it was a good contract that paid me well over the past 10 months, and I probably could have been looking at a nice sum of cash for another 7 or 8 months at least. But I wasn't happy; in essence, I didn't go into business for myself to be working what had essentially become a job for another company. I went into business because I had a dream, a passion, and I wanted to share it with other people.

What happened? Almost immediately, as soon as I sent the letter off, suddenly I felt the spark of life that hadn't been there in such a long time. I felt this relief of sorts, that I was ready to get back on the road that I had always wanted to be in. I had let go of this comfortable place that I'd been sitting in, and started to feel the passion I had when I decided to go out on my own. And suddenly, my mind was once again open to more of what was out there that I hadn't quite given my mind the time to absorb.

The first step was going to a seminar on my own, after I had given my first seminar. The topic was self awareness; how timely was this! As the presenter talked, I realized that I was feeling at the level of an 8 out of 10 at that moment, but hours earlier if I'd been asked that question I would have had to say 3 out of 10. There is a liberation of your soul when you finally decide that you're not going to allow others to dominate your destiny, and subjugate your spirit. During this seminar, I heard people state that they felt anywhere between a 3 and a 6, and here I came out with my 8, which wasn't high enough, but was still the highest in the room. I knew I was on my way, though; every person needs to have a dream to strive for, and if you're on the road to that dream you're always going up.

Over the next few days, as I talked to people, most of them who I'd interacted with on a more consistent basis were reacting to me differently; I believed they were seeing a spirit that I hadn't had recently. I'm always friendly and courteous, but there was a new found sense of urgency; not out of fear, but out of the fact that, since I was now ready to focus on me again, I wanted to try to reach my ultimate goals as fast as I could. My goals aren't totally self serving; I want to bring people along with me, and not just my wife, because the essence of sharing feels good; it's good for the heart to share. It's also good for the heart to have others revel in your triumphs, no matter what kind of triumphs they are.

I can honestly say that I made people happy every single day this past week. But I can also say that I accepted some gifts, something one might call lucky breaks, but timely gifts nonetheless. I had someone tell me that I was an inspiration to them, and that they wanted to succeed, if only to show me how much I meant to them by talking to them and helping to set them on the right path. I had someone else thank me for helping their seminar go in a positive manner by my participation, as I made a statement in trying to help clarify a point he was trying to make. I had someone else tell me, after my last seminar, that he felt I had something to offer to people, and that he was happy and proud to have had the opportunity to get to know me. This was from a man who had, not only some substance on the topic, but a long history and background in the same field I'm in now, someone who, with all his experiences, should have been hard to impress.

I've talked a lot about myself in this newsletter, but I've done that to make a point I hope you've understood. Many of you get up every morning, get into the shower and clean up, maybe eat a little something, then head off to a job you don't really like. You may feel that you don't have any choices in your life because you need the money, for whatever reason that may be. You may feel that you don't have any choices because you've only learned one thing in life, have only one skill, and can't envision yourself doing anything else. You may feel that you don't have any choices because you've been beat down by life, circumstances, and realities that have possibly inhibited your ability to dream of the type of life you wish to lead.

I'm not telling anyone they need to leave a job they're in; please don't interpret my saying anything like that. What I am saying is that everyone has to find a way to motivate themselves, to think about their dreams and wishes and feelings; you deserve the right to think about yourself first, to take care of yourself first, before anything or anyone else. If you don't take care of yourself, you can't possibly take care of anyone else. If you don't take care of yourself, you can't possibly do the best job possible; performance has to suffer.

Over the weekend, think about the job you do, whether you work for yourself or someone else. Think about whether or not you're happy doing the work you do. If you're happy with the work, think about whether you're happy with the situation you happen to be in. If not, think of all the reasons you may not be happy. Is it co-workers; is it boredom; is it location; is it the monotony? Whatever it is, or they are, write it all down; if you don't write it down, it doesn't exist. After you've written it down, write down what happens to you when this event makes you unhappy; for me, it was this pit in my stomach whenever I thought about working with this client. Then write down 3 or 4 scenarios that you can control that can help you change this feeling and make your situation more positive for you.

In my case, my client was out of state, and I didn't have the ability to get responses from them, either through email or by phone. It was a no-win scenario, and since the only thing I could control was my contact with them, I went that direction. For you, though, if you have the ability to at least address your issue in some manner, why not do it? What's stopping you from allowing yourself to be happy and content at whatever it is you want to do? How can you motivate yourself? Aren't you worth it? I'll answer that one; yes!

As Zig Ziglar says, if you can find the positive in yourself and show it to the world, you'll receive positives back many more times over. Give it a try this coming week; and, if you get a chance, drop me a line and tell me how it worked.